The Unsung Hero

Last night I watched a film known as Hostel II on DVD, provided by my sister’s boyfriend. I can safely say it was the most illogical, boring horror movie I have ever seen (which in an entire genre of mostly filler, that is saying something).

Once past the obligatory reminder/excuse to decapitate the survivor of the previous film, things start badly with an introduction to the three main characters, who are at best a gallery of stereotypes. It seems the director thought that the previous film with it’s all male cast did not appeal enough to the pre-pubescent hormonal boys i can only assume this series is designed to appeal to, as they have been replaced with a gaggle of female leads, taken straight from any teenage flick you care to mention- the geeky one, the rich one and the annoying preppy one.

All three of them are for some reason seduced into coming to Slovakia while on a trip across Europe, where they check into a normal seeming youth hostel. It turns out that the hostel is actually a macabre business which allows incredibly rich 40-somethings with nothing better to do with their lives to bid on the lives of young innocents, and continue to maim and dispatch them in whatever gruesome way pleases them most. In this way, the film draws many parallels to that most despicably pointless series of films, the Saw franchise, in that it is an excuse to see (vaguely) attractive young things get horrifically mutilated in increasingly foul ways.

The film focuses mostly on one of the girls, along with two brothers, one of which has paid for him and his sibling to come with him on a “business trip” and prove that he has the guts to kill another human being (the reasoning being that Slovakia is a lawless country where they will not get in any trouble back home). The film shows some promise of depth when one of the brothers starts to have second thoughts about the whole thing upon meeting his destined victim, but at that point the director decides, that no, he’d rather have lots of people die instead, and everything goes down the swannee. Lots of swearing, genitals being mutilated, faces being sawn off, and one unfortunate man being mauled to death by a pair of  Dobermen.

If this loss of a completely decent (if predictable) ending was not bad enough, the  single heroine left over by now (the rich one) ends up armed with a pistol, her assailant dying, and what i was expecting to at least be a half decent shootout scene. But the director decides on yet another cop out, with the lass deciding to buy her way out of the situation. I’m sure this was supposed to be some kind of commentary on the inherant corruption within the business of today, or america’s ability to buy itself out of everything, but such things do not make for good viewing no matter what the message is.

All things considered, I came away from my seat in the living room disappointed. I’m really quite glad that I didn’t have to pay for it at the cinema, in any case.

1/10